What Is Forgiveness? 
In this page I have attempted to define forgiveness, or should I say "that which inverses our fog!", as I have interpreted it from ACIM.  I also offer a forgiveness exercise that I use.  Clearly, this is an expansive topic to tackle for a relatively new student to ACIM!   But, I didn't let my writing stray far from the Course.  In fact, there are more quotes from ACIM than my own writing!  Also, writing doesn't come naturally to me.   But I will attempt to teach this and, in doing so, I hope to learn something.  I hope that you find it useful. - Ed

 
J pointed out to us that an anagram of "forgiveness" is "inverses fog". 

That coudn't be more appropriate! 
 
As J says in the Text on page 218 about "fog":

"The light in them (our brothers) shines as brightly regardless of the density of the fog that obscures it. If you give no power to the fog to obscure the light, it has none. For it has power only if the Son of God gives power to it. He must himself withdraw that power, remembering that all power is of God. You can remember this for all the Sonship. Do not allow your brother not to remember, for his forgetfulness is yours. But your remembering is his, for God cannot be remembered alone. This is what you have forgotten. To perceive the healing of your brother as the healing of yourself is thus the way to remember God. For you forgot your brothers with Him, and God's Answer to your forgetting is but the way to remember."

*Image above entitled "Anagram", borrowed with permission from http://www.mysticfractal.com/.

The Course says that forgiveness, as it defines it, is the key to happiness (Lesson 121) and true peace and salvation.  In fact, ACIM contains the word “forgiveness” 408 times; “forgive” appears 146 times.  Forgiveness and the miracle, which are related, are in fact the central themes of the Course.  So, the question then arises, what is this new forgiveness?  Why should I care?  Do I really need it?  How do I do it?

According to Merriam-Webster:

Forgive :

1 a : to give up resentment of or claim to requital for <forgiveb : to grant relief from payment of <forgive a debt>
2 : to cease to feel resentment against (an offender) : PARDON <forgive one's enemies> an insult>

intransitive verb: to grant forgiveness

The world’s definition of forgiveness implies that “we know you did it” but that we’re just going to overlook it, for now, to the extent that we won’t claim retribution.  As ACIM says: “It pardons "sinners" sometimes, but remains aware that they have sinned.” (Text, pg. 640) Also from ACIM, “Who can say and mean, "My brother, you have injured me, and yet, because I am the better of the two, I pardon you my hurt". His pardon and your hurt cannot exist together. One denies the other and must make it false.” (Text, pg 568)  This is the type of “forgiveness” that keeps us angry and afraid – the exact opposite of peace and happiness that we all say we want.

 
The Course’s definition of forgiveness: “Forgiveness is the healing of the perception of separation.” (Text, pg 46)  However, in order to understand this definition, the word “separation” must also be defined.  The Course only briefly describes how the separation seemed to occur: “Into eternity, where all is one, there crept a tiny, mad idea, at which the Son of God remembered not to laugh. In his forgetting did the thought become a serious idea, and possible of both accomplishment and real effects.” (Text, pg 586)

With this idea, a part of our mind became convinced that the impossible had actually occurred – that the Father and his Son could be apart.  This amnesia brought with it unbearable and extreme guilt and fear.  The “real effects” is the making of perception which introduced degrees, aspects and intervals (space and time).  In other words, an entire universe is imagined, complete with a world and bodies which we seem to inhabit.  The aspect of the mind that believes this is called the “ego”.  However, the Course emphatically says that what God didn’t create can never really exist.  Nevertheless, for a very long time the Son of God has been perpetuating the idea that the separation occurred.  J (Jesus) tells us that forgiveness is the only way to heal this belief.  In fact, he was the first Soul to do it.  Now as our elder brother and sure Guide, he implores us to listen to his Guidance. “There is nothing about me that you cannot attain. I have nothing that does not come from God. The difference between us now is that I have nothing else. This leaves me in a state which is only potential in you.” (Text, pg 7)  Fortunately, J is infinitely patient and never tires!  Back to forgiveness…

You’ve got to hold on tightly
Let go lightly
It’s only surrender, it’s all in the game
If you just hold on tightly
Let go lightly
There’s always forgiveness and no one to blame

-John Denver, "Hold On Tightly, (Let Go Lightly)"

So, "A Course In Miracles" says forgiveness, which is a form of miracle, is how we restore our Minds to sanity, or the pre-separation state.  In this state of Truth, we will only experience God’s gifts of peace and joy.  We are being asked to “sacrifice” or “give up” hell (misery, death, guilt, fear of God) for Heaven (bliss, life, knowledge of absolute Oneness with the Creator).

Not only is it the way for Atonement or healing but it’s the only Holy function we have here: “Forgiveness is the only function here, and serves to bring the joy this world denies to every aspect of God's Son where sin was thought to rule.” (Text, pg 555, emphasis is mine)

“Forgiveness is the great need of this world, but that is because it is a world of illusions.” (Workbook, Lesson 46)

Even the ego will concede that forgiveness is a virtue.

“The ego, too, has a plan of forgiveness because you are asking for one, though not of the right teacher. The ego's plan, of course, makes no sense and will not work. By following its plan you will merely place yourself in an impossible situation, to which the ego always leads you.” (Text, pg 169)

 

But, as we’ve already said, forgiveness as defined by the ego or the conventional world view is equivalent to “forgive but never forget”.  It insists on holding onto its judgment even given the fact that it has no basis from which to judge anything with knowledge.

 

“The ego's plan is to have you see error clearly first, and then overlook it. Yet how can you overlook what you have made real? By seeing it clearly, you have made it real and cannot overlook it” (Text, pg 169).

The Holy Spirit’s forgiveness asks us to be willing to completely forget all non-loving thoughts, not deny them. However, our self-made “teacher”, the ego, has made it seem quite dangerous to do this. The Holy Spirit is asking us to bring Him every secret that we have kept in darkness.  At our request, he will look on the darkness with us and lighten it away.  He will show us that the hurt we felt was due to an incorrect interpretation which he can easily correct by reminding us of God’s one purpose.  The hurts (darkness) can not coexist with the light of Truth; as such, they will be forgotten.  (See Text, pgs 46 and 288)


“Joining with Him in seeing is the way in which you learn to share with Him the interpretation of perception that leads to knowledge. You cannot see alone. Sharing perception with Him Whom God has given you teaches you how to recognize what you see. It is the recognition that nothing you see means anything alone. Seeing with Him will show you that all meaning, including yours, comes not from double vision, but from the gentle fusing of everything into one meaning, one emotion and one purpose.” (Text, pg 288)


This quote further emphasizes that J wants us to bring him our hurts rather than deny them: “Conflict must be resolved. It cannot be evaded, set aside, denied, disguised, seen somewhere else, called by another name, or hidden by deceit of any kind, if it would be escaped. It must be seen exactly as it is, where it is thought to be, in the reality which has been given it, and with the purpose that the mind accorded it. For only then are its defenses lifted, and the truth can shine upon it as it disappears.” (Workbook, Lesson 333)

“Forgiveness through the Holy Spirit lies simply in looking beyond error from the beginning, and thus keeping it unreal for you. Do not let any belief in its realness enter your mind, or you will also believe that you must undo what you have made in order to be forgiven. What has no effect does not exist, and to the Holy Spirit the effects of error are nonexistent." (Text, pg 169)

“Forgiveness removes only the untrue, lifting the shadows from the world and carrying it, safe and sure within its gentleness, to the bright world of new and clean perception.” (Text, pg 396)

Clearly, this type of forgiveness is very alien to how most of us think.  Holy Spirit acknowledges this and says that it’s something to be learned.

“Forgiveness is acquired. It is not inherent in the mind, which cannot sin. As sin is an idea you taught yourself, forgiveness must be learned by you as well, but from a Teacher other than yourself, Who represents the other Self in you. Through Him you learn how to forgive the self you think you made, and let it disappear. Thus you return your mind as one to Him Who is your Self, and Who can never sin.”  (Workbook, Lesson 214, emphasis is mine)

The Course says that when we are willing to release our attack thoughts, we allow Holy Spirit to remind us of the Truth, which is that we and our seeming enemies are wholly innocent.  (see Lessons 21, 22, 23)  The characters in the play may seem good or bad, but they are only characters.  We never have enough information to be able to judge anyone or anything, including ourselves.  As lesson 25 says, “I do not know what anything is for”.

I know you don't want to hear what I say
I know you're gonna keep turning away
But I've been there and if I can survive
I can keep you alive
I'm not above going through it again
I'm not above being cool for a while
If you're cruel to me I'll understand

Some people run from a possible fight
Some people figure they can never win
And although this is a fight I can lose
The accused is an innocent man
I am an innocent man
Oh yes I am
An innocent man

You know you only hurt yourself out of spite
I guess you'd rather be a martyr tonight
That's your decision
But I'm not below
Anybody I know
If there's a chance of resurrecting a love
I'm not above going back to the start
To find out where the heartache began

Some people hope for a miracle cure
Some people just accept the world as it is
But I'm not willing to lay down and die
Because I am an innocent man

-Billy Joel, excerpt from "Innocent Man"

The Course also appeals to us to drop our defenses and rest in our innocence.  As J said in the Bible during the time of his arrest, “for all who draw the sword will die by the sword” (Matt 26:52) refers to the projective nature of perception.  When we feel that we are vulnerable to attack, we reinforce the separation and the idea that we ourselves can attack!  This serves the ego’s purpose of recycling guilt.  However, through forgiveness, the Holy Spirit is reminding us that this childish game need not be.  In Truth, none of us are guilty, for we remain wholly as God created us.  “The blameless cannot blame, and those who have accepted their innocence see nothing to forgive.  Yet forgiveness is the means by which I will recognize my innocence.” (Workbook, Lesson 60)

This passage addresses the misperception of our brothers and how such beliefs can be forgiven in order to heal our minds. “This brother who stands beside you still seems to be a stranger. You do not know him, and your interpretation of him is very fearful. And you attack him still, to keep what seems to be yourself unharmed. Yet in his hands is your salvation. You see his madness, which you hate because you share it. And all the pity and forgiveness that would heal it gives way to fear. Brother, you need forgiveness of your brother, for you will share in madness or in Heaven together. And you will raise your eyes in faith together, or not at all.”  (Text, pg 422)

 

In this next passage, forgiveness is referred to as correction where the error being corrected is the belief in separation.  “Miracle-minded forgiveness is only correction. It has no element of judgment at all. The statement "Father forgive them for they know not what they do" in no way evaluates what they do. It is an appeal to God to heal their minds. There is no reference to the outcome of the error. That does not matter.” (Text, pg 28)

How to Forgive:

As alluded to earlier, we really don’t know how to forgive, at least not perfectly.  It’s something that J will teach us.  But, we are asked to keep practicing.  Also, we’re told that as we forgive, we will immediately feel its effects:

“The one remaining problem that you have is that you see an interval between the time when you forgive, and will receive the benefits of trusting in your brother.” (Text, pg 558)

 
“Ask, rather, to learn how to forgive, and to restore what always was to your unforgiving mind. Atonement becomes real and visible to those who use it. On earth this is your only function, and you must learn that it is all you want to learn. You will feel guilty till you learn this.” (Text, pg 279, emphasis is mine)

These are the steps to allowing forgiveness that I use1:

  1. Acknowledge that I am responsible for any upset that I feel.  The hurt and pain that I feel are in my mind.  I must be buying into them for them to remain.  In this step I identify and feel into the emotions rather than suppressing them.
  2. I admit, often begrudgingly, that it is possible to feel differently - that there is another way of seeing this.  I don’t know how this burden can be lifted but I am open to help.
  3. I imagine myself collecting all of these hurts and grievances into a container of some sort: a sack is a favorite of mine, but any virtual container will work!  I know this seems silly at first.
  4. I imagine myself walking up to the altar of God and the Son of God.  This is the most Holy part of the temple.  Standing there I see J (Jesus) smiling at me.  For some reason, he’s always happy to see me!  I either give him the sack or place it at the foot of the altar.
  5. As sincerely as I can, I state that I am willing to see it differently and I am open to God’s help.  I then pray to have these hurts and misperceptions be replaced by the memory of Truth and innocence.  In this step, I am “actively surrendering” into God’s Will.
  6. Sometimes I take J’s hand, and his quiet presence reassures me that I am loved and being guided home.

After this heart-felt process, I ALWAYS feel much better.  In fact, I often times can’t remember what I was upset about!  The jerk character that I placed in that sack has been transformed into a loving brother.  The regret I felt when thinking about that argument with my parents twenty years ago is no longer present.  The anger I felt about that news report doesn’t sit so heavy in my heart now.

“Can you imagine how beautiful those you forgive will look to you?” (Text, pg 352)


I should tell you that there are a number of people who have taken multiple trips to the altar in that virtual sack!  Remember, it’s a process and a practice.  With each forgiveness my mind is being healed, bit-by-bit.  When practicing this, I spend more of my day feeling peaceful.  Of course, this affects everyone around me.  In fact, the Course says that it affects the entire Sonship. “The light of the world brings peace to every mind through my forgiveness”. (Workbook, Lesson 63) 

Every time I get upset, I have a choice between remaining miserable and angry for as long as I want, or I can be willing to hand it over to Spirit.  The quicker I do, the better I feel!  In fact, we should be grateful for each F.O. (forgiveness opportunity) as it presents an opportunity to heal our insane mind and bring us that much closer to fully remembering our true Identity – being fully connected with our Creator and our brothers in eternal peace and joy.

Ref 1: This is essentially the same method described in Gary Renard’s Disappearance of the Universe which I highly recommend as it really emphasizes the importance of forgiveness.  I also recommend reading the section in ACIM “The Decision for God”, (Text, pg 88).

All  photography by Amy Barrington unless noted otherwise.